It’s getting exceedingly difficult to stay in your periphery. But at the same time I find myself setting up camp here. I suppose this is what Patroclus might’ve felt when he first set foot on the beaches of Troy– young, naive, far too trusting. For once I don’t mind. Surprised that I quite like it here, actually.
Sometimes I think I’ve felt everything I’m ever gonna feel, and from here on out I’m not going to feel anything new, just lesser versions of what I’ve already felt.
Be warned, this is not a proper film review. This is more of a very informal and confused thought train (oh hah, pun of the day) in an attempt to de-Nicolas Cage this 2 hour spectacle.
SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT: I’m just going to assume that you watched it because I really don’t care.
“All we want in life is a Brokeback Mountain kind of love. The kind that seeps into your blood… the kind you live on. Except, you know, minus the fucking sheep, bigotry and… basically, other people.” (Fabian, 2013)
I’ve always wanted the world, and more. It’s in my nature.
It’s ridiculous to hear it now, but I’ve been pondering on what I really want to do with my life. With my future, career-wise.
It really just hit me earlier in religion class when Sister asked us how God reveals Himself to us.
Of course, I said that God was always an essential part in my process of decision-making. (Which is very true, ever since All The Evil happened last year)
That was a Millenium reference, if you spotted it.
I think I’m starting to question my decision for my career path. I mean yeah, the thing I want isn’t exactly the easiest path (well it’s fruckin hard, tbh), but I really love it. P.S. I’m talking about film.
Cinema is such a big thing in my life– and to be honest, I don’t think there’s anything besides poetry and film that I’m extremely passionate about. Well, besides traveling, and perhaps eating, but wow, now I’m rambling. Ok.
Back to the main issue here.
My ultimate dream is to direct my own movie. Like Francis Ford Coppola, Alfred Hitchcock, Steve McQueen and all that jazz. Directing is something that I am extremely interested in (not the play type of drama, if I liked that kind of thing I would’ve joined Curtain Call), and screenwriting sounds pretty tempting too. I love Hollywood glam, I mean literally everything about the art of cinema I love. I can’t act, but I love the whole idea of acting– so I’d rather direct and stuff. Plus I want to venture into the wonderful world of cinematography! Ahhh I’m already giddy. Damn.
But at the same time, practicality has to eventually come in the picture. I chose Economics since well, I don’t exactly hate it, and I do enjoy my Marx and Freakonomics as well. Problem is, it’s jot something that I love love, you get me? It’s okay, but I want more. As usual.
Okay, I’ve rambled on for quite some time and it’s 22 minutes past midnight and I do have my Economics exam tomorrow which I need to ace– so adieu, farewell. Wish me luck.
a certain fondness for tension, for ambiguity.
i cannot live with this,
but i cannot live without it.
P.S. I am obsessed with Kenneth Branagh’s obsession with dutch angles in Thor. So pretty.
If only my life could be filmed like a Shakespearean movie (the best of both worlds). I wouldn’t mind Tom Hiddleston being in it too.